Thursday, November 18, 2010

Success in Haggling is Tied to One's Charisma Stat

A man who infrequently comes to the store and even more infrequently rents enters the Dominion one October evening with two big boxes. “Hey, uh, yeah, I was wonderin' if you wanted to buy some old VHS tapes offa me. I need some quick cash. Thirty bucks for the whole bunch.”

Fernando is mildly intrigued, since he does sell used VHS tapes and people occasionally buy them to bring them to their hunting camps and other wilderness hidey holes. So he meanders over and takes a look at what the man's got. Lots of James Bond. Some were movies that the man had purchased from the Dominion at a nebulous point in the past, for they still bore the Dominion's stickers. Others were things Fernando would probably never be able to sell because everyone already owned the film in question, like the two copies of What's Love Got to Do With It cluttering his sales rack (He has even more in the back room. What the deal is with people and having owned that movie is a mystery for the ages). The cases are for the most part decent-looking, but a few have obvious water damage to them. All in all, maybe fifty, sixty movies total.

Fernando rubs his forehead and does some quick business math aerobics and says, “I can give you twenty dollars in credit for them.”

Well, I was hopin' to get some cash. There are a lot of them in there. You could resell 'em for over a hundred dollars.”

Sorry, I only give credit for trade-ins. And the unfortunate fact is that there are a lot of crap commons that everybody already has two or three copies of.” Fernando points to the first Austin Powers movie leering up at him from one of the boxes as an example. “And some of the cases are a little dingy and beat up so they don't look nearly as nice on the rack. And you have maybe fifty movies here, and I don't sell used VHS tapes for nearly enough to make a hundred bucks off that number.”

Well, how's the credit work?”

Fernando is a little stunned at this question. “It's pretty much a credit account and if you rent or buy stuff it gets used up.”

Oh. Well, can ya make an exception? I really need the cash right now.”

Fernando spreads his hands. “I'd love to help you, but it's store policy. It makes the accounting much less messy for me on this end. If you really, really wanted cash for them, though, I can give you ten.”

Well, I say they're worth at least thirty bucks.”

Twenty in credit or ten in cash is the best I can do.”

Oh, ok. I'll check up at the Sound Shelf and see if they can do me a better deal. I really need the cash right now.” Yes, yes, Fernando gets it. You need the cash right now. But regurgitating the same tired plea for the fourth time after the first time didn't work is an exercise in irritation.

Yeah. Sorry.” Fernando goes back to his desk, for he has had enough of this.

The man then proceeds to fill out a slip for Fernando's weekly gift certificate drawing (without renting anything, of course) and leaves.

UPDATE: The individual in question returns to the Dominion about a week later and informs Fernando that he sold his boxes of tapes for $16 at the Sound Shelf. So good for him? He also didn't rent. Again.

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