Fernando has just restocked his Adopt-A-Movie Box with another selection of awesome films. One of these super-terrific titles is An American Carol, which is what happens when someone with a blatant conservative agenda tries to make a satirical comedy. The commentary it provides is about as subtle and funny as a cinder block dropped from a four-story building. Needless to say, it was not screened for critics and overall poorly received but for places like Free Republic and the politics trolls on Fark.
A customer enters the store to rent a movie, and she peruses the box while Fernando does his busy-work. She comes across the film in question. “Hey, is this movie at all like A Christmas Carol? I love that story. I have, gosh, dozens of different versions of it.”
“Um.” Fernando is in a right pickle. He does not desire being a sleazy salesperson and talking up the movie's quality to make an extra four bucks. On the other hand, that movie takes up valuable shelf space (the purpose behind the Adopt-A-Movie Box being to increase the availability of this), and four dollars through sale is more profit he's derived from that thing in all the years he's owned the Dominion. Even adding his cashier jockey days when it was a new, er, “hot” title, that thing had made less than twenty dollars, just barely enough to recoup the initial investment.
Therefore, Fernando chooses his words with caution. “It's like it only in the broadest of thematic senses. There is really nothing to do with Christmas. The focus is more on spiritual advisers revealing the negative consequences of one's current course of action.”
“I'll take it. It sounds fun.”
Relief floods through Fernando's body. The transaction concludes and the woman departs, satisfied with her new purchase.
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