Wedge Issues

It's a simply gorgeous, eighty degree day, one that defies the local climate seeing as it's mid-October. Fernando makes the most of it by propping his door open and allowing Nature to fill his Dominion with the warmth and vigor of Autumn's last hurrah before the merciless claws of Winter sink deep into the environs-metaphor. In part because Fernando is a cheap bastard who refuses to shell out a couple of bucks on a plastic wedge and in part because Fernando is a practical bastard who makes use of what he has available, the object being used to prop the door is one of his countless plastic VHS rental cases.

Not once, but twice, on that day did Fernando have variations on the following conversation:

Customer: “You know that your door is wide open.”

Fernando: “Yep.”

Customer: “There's a case in there. Is that supposed to be there?”

Fernando: “Yeah. That's what I'm using to prop the door.”

Customer: “Oh. Did you want me to take it out when I leave?”

Fernando: “No, that won't be necessary, thanks.”

On a third occasion, though, the VHS case's utility was ignored, with the person in question fishing the case out from under the door and bringing it up to Fernando upon entry.

Customer: “This was holding your door open. I figured I should bring it to you and let you know.”

Fernando: “...Thanks.” Fernando then proceeded to jam the hunk of plastic back where it belonged without waiting for the person to leave.

By closing time the case was a warped and ruined mess, so Fernando rewarded its valiant sacrifice with a proper send-off; he chucked it in his garbage. The other VHS cases on Fernando's shelves were understandably envious that this lucky one had been sent to VHS Rental Case Heaven. But don't worry, Assorted Other VHS Cases. Your time will come as well.