Friend

One foggy February day Fernando is updating his Chronicles when the phone rings. The caller ID reads “Wireless Caller.”

“Hello, Dominion of Movies?”

The voice on the other end is a gritty male and not any of the gritty males that frequent the store. “Yes. Is Aeris Gainsborough there?” (That isn't the actual name that was used, else this exchange would have been far more fun and less creepy. The name has been altered to protect the innocent).

Bizarre request. “Um...no?”

The voice on the other end remains a dry rasp. “Do you know who that is?”

“I do.” She was a semiregular customer but hadn't been to the store in months now.

“Have you seen her lately?”

Bizarrer. “May I ask who is calling?”

“A friend,” the voice wheezes. Well, that settled it. This guy was totally trustworthy and Fernando was ready to turn over everything he asked to him.

Wait, no. It actually sent up all kinds of red flags, so Fernando turned into kind of a dick in order to salvage some utility from this conversation before it inevitably dead-ended. “That was very helpful, thanks. To answer your initial question, Aeris either is in my store or she is not.”

“Is she?” the voice asks in that creepy, raspy monotone.

“I'm not sure. I'm not even one hundred percent sure I'm in the store.” (Which is arguably true if anyone wants to debate the epistemological foundation of that statement).

The voice on the other end grunts in frustration and hangs up.

Bizarre.