Repo Man

A guy who has rented at a store numerous times in the past comes in one day and takes out two movies, The Avengers and Five Year Reunion. This happens in the beginning of October.

Responsibility left the building for a good long while and Fernando eventually wrote the movies off as stolen. He appended them to the Annual Abscondments for the year and everything.

Then, amazingly, they come back in early November. The young man brings them up to the counter. “Hey. What's my late fee on these?”

Fernando rises and takes the movies into his custody, ensuring that they are in their cases and undamaged. Then he answers, “Eighty-eight dollars.”

This flummoxes the man. “What? I thought you stopped late fees at twenty bucks!”

“No. I stop them after two weeks. These were out for about a month, but I stop the late fees after two weeks.”

“Yeah, but I brought them back. That's gotta count for something.”

“It does. Now the late fee is only eighty-eight dollars instead of one hundred and thirty-eight.”

“I can't believe—I should have just fucking bought them outright!”

Fernando makes a noncommittal sound. No words he could say would change the facts of the situation.

The man clenches his fists and raises one arm. “You...fuck.” He lowers the fist and storms out.

“Have a good evening!”